It Is Bedtime and...

After the children put on a Calapp Comedy show, it is time for bed. But Logan has one more joke. “Well, I was sitting next to this frog and… someone ate it.” And I laugh. He runs to hug me. We say prayers and I tuck him in. Then I tuck in Brennen and Sethie, who want hugs first, and that car, and this blanket just so. Then Aubrey wants to talk. “Why did her skit about the girl whose favorite animal was a seashell fall flat, when almost everything Kamron said was funny and made everyone laugh. He’s always so funny, and he’s handsome and everyone likes to watch him and be around him, including me, and I don’t have any talents at all.” She says her prayers and prays for talents. I remind her of her artwork and she brightens jumps up and says what should I draw? With Logan’s joke still in my head I say “a frog.” In no time she has a beautiful frog drawn on her page. She smiles, and then frowns, “but that talent isn’t on a stage and nobody is watching me and clapping. I want people to watch me and clap.” We talk more and I hug her and tuck her in. Kamron is in the bath, so I go to my room. Pretty soon he knocks. He doesn’t have much to say just a little more about Twilight Camp-he did CPR again today, and lots of archery, and well, good night. He’s not too old for a hug and then he goes off to bed. It is 10:30 and I stop to think and it occurs to me, I am that lady. I am Mom. This means little to some people but when I say Mom, I mean like my mom. The lady who sat for hours listening to my questions and concerns, stories and joys-feeling them, sharing them and making me feel all was right with the world. When I think of my mom, it seems almost sacrilegious to say that I am Mom, and, yet, I can look through the eyes of my children and I can see it. To them I am that lady. I am Mom.